death

I-am-back!Buhahaha!

So yes, I’m back!

And what have I been doing all this time?

Well, I’ve been on an excellent family vaction to Kodaikanal!

The hills were magnificent and the cold was soothing! We traveled by train from Chennai to Virudhunagar and my uncle picked us up in his car. We drove uphill to Kodai. The guest house we stayed in was at Kohinoor (Yes like the diamonds and the condoms) and it was a sight for sore metropolitan eyes!

One of the many beautiful valleys @ Kodaikanal

One of the many beautiful valleys @ Kodaikanal

Most of the pictures are in my Orkut / Facebook albums.

I also had one of the best weekends ever! I caught up with Thomas (Same Restaurant but no crazy photographer this time)! Then we decided to hit a multiplex. Come weekend and all the movies were sold out except Terminator Salvation. The movie wasn’t bad. I liked the bikes! After the movie I succumbed to a waffle basket and then we rode by the beach.

Waffle Basket @ City Center!

Waffle Basket @ City Center!

I was wiped out by the time I reached home as I had not slept since my night shift the previous night.

Sunday dawned bright and early with my brother Arun Joseph offering to take me to Ice Age: Dawn of the dinosaurs! Little did I know, that our brother and sister quality time would be shared by 31 other friends !!Who am I to complain, we had the best seats in the house… Wait, we had almost all the seats in the house!

I love animated movies and I’ve been a fan of Scrat and Sid since the very first part. Disappointing however, is Diego, who turns out to be a big softie. No saber tooth tiger here folks! He acts like an overgrown fur ball. And to think I loved him! Kind of reminds me of Chandler Bing in Season 9 and 10, where he is always reading a newspaper or a magazine and isn’t really ‘Chandler’ ish anymore… After the movie and some fun with the gang, I came home to await the arrival of my irritating Uncle R. (Don’t’ ask, rolling eyes).

I was supposed to meet with the blogger gang and Apar and Aaarti called in (Hugz Y’all!). Unfortunately, I couldn’t make it as it was too far away , to make it back home on time. Thankfully, Ashwin (my friend who lives close by) invited me over as a mutual friend and her husband were visiting. I couldn’t make it to her wedding and so I sheepishly dragged my behind there and offered an apology for the second time. She didn’t seem to mind and it was all laughs and hugs just like old times…

I came back home in time to catch Uncle R gorging on rotis and mangoes at my dining table. Mom seemed relieved to see me and my brother who was at wits’ end never looked at me with so much love!

I spent most of Monday drinking coffee and basking in peoples’ lovely comments on my new hair cut…

Hopefully I’ll find time to blog more often!

That’s my weekend folks! Hope yours was just as much fun and eventful.

Like a bridge over troubled water

For Rainbows and Dungeons
Jan 27,09
“How sad na, look at his fate ya” I cringe. I turn around to retort. His warm hand on the small of my back and his gentle voice “Let it go AJ”
“I wanted to tell her to shut her face” I complain. My limited understanding of the world and its workings does not help me rationalize this theory… Unexplainable things are always labeled as ‘the result of fate’, ‘in God’s hands’ and ‘God is testing us’
I beg to differ on each count…
Fate… Well, isn’t fate an excuse for when we find no other excuse?
God, now, I do not believe that the creator goes around picking out grand prize winners. And I’m sure big G can come up with more ‘God like’ ways to test man and not by way of slow, painful, heart wrenching, death. He isn’t an agony monger, is he?
Maybe all my frustration comes out of a sense of helplessness. True, I feel helpless, like a big chunk of nothing, saying nothing words of encouragement, bringing nothing flowers, reading out loud from nothing books, holding his hand and saying nothing prayers, wiping a stray tear with a nothing kiss… In the end, the only thing that is true is the agony everyone undergoes, leading to that fateful day.
That fateful day: ‘He’s in not in pain anymore’ {amazing grace how sweet the sound} ‘Dear Lord! Welcome your son into thy kingdom’ {that saved a wretch like me} ‘You have to be strong’, ‘God tests His children’ {I once was lost, but now am found} ‘I know how you feel’, ‘you still have your life’, ‘from ashes to ashes, dust to dust’, ‘Akka, when will maama come home?’{Was blind, but now I see} “You walked out of the service?”
Me: “Yeah I needed some air… I hate the song they are singing”
D: “Amazing Grace? You’re crying”
Me: “uhhuh”
D: “Well do you want to sing him another song?”
Me: “huh?”
D: “you said, you did not like amazing grace right? So sing him another song…”
Me: “Right here?”
D: “Yeah, here hold my hand… I’ll join you. No wait, let me finish this cigarette”
Me: “I can’t sing… I’ll cry”
D: “Here let me sing you a song ok?”

{When you’re weary, feeling small,
When tears are in your eyes, I will dry them all;
I’m on your side. When times get rough
and friends just can’t be found,
like a bridge over troubled water
I will lay me down.
Like a bridge over troubled water
I will lay me down.}
Me: I think I’ll go inside now D,{Like a bridge over troubled water…I will lay me down}

Between the brontosaurus and the blue whale…

For Rainbows and Dungeons

Jan 18,09
Mom had issued her ultimatum ‘clean up your bookshelf, the neighbor’s cat is missing, it could’ve crawled in there and died and we wouldn’t know it”, her third one this week I think.
Well, amidst all my Hawthorne and Marquez lays the dust covered pearly white “Tell me why”. I pick it up and it feels like I’ve done it a million times… I turn automatically to page 257. Crinkled and dried, dark, papery, fragile… unlike the memory it brings. The remains of my once velvet rose, remains of my first love.
It wasn’t like a dream… I’m not the princess types. I’m loud when I’m angry, swear when am pissed, I bonked a guy with a cricket bat once, kneed a few more, I like being alone,love being with friends, I can’t paint my face, I’d rather paint a wall. No, It wasn’t like a dream at all… It was like a miracle.
Do you know how it feels when all your life, you feel despise, hate, anger, abuse and then there is the old velvet rose… crushed in his jacket, dropped by his sweaty palm, the last attempt (to make it ‘rose-like’) gone awry… And then it comes into your life, the most beautiful mangled velvet rose, paid for with saved samosa money.
Now it lies there, receiving its due of tears;” I miss you”, I say gently.
Life and death are mysteries to man; to me its right here, between the brontosaurus and the blue whale.
My old velvet rose… life, love, beauty, agony… Death – MEMORIES….
Fade to Black.